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Five Tips to Help Parents Listen Centereach NY

The only way we can truly be sure that they are all right, or if something is troubling them, is if they feel they can confide in us on a person-to-person basis. But are we actually listening to them as equals, or are we listening to them with condescending ears and, in the process, inadvertently breaking these lines of communication between parent and child -- leaving them unwilling to come to us for help?

Ms. Flo Marshak
FLO MARSHAK, L.C.S.W.
(631) 724-5500
50 Karl Ave. Suite 205
Smithtown, NY
Credentials
Credentials: LCSW
Licensed in New York
12 Years of Experience
Problems Served
Addictions/Other (gambling, sex, etc.), Addictions/Substance, Anxiety/Panic Disorders, Bipolar Disorders, Child Abuse and Neglect, Couple or Marital Issues, Depression, Dissociative Disorders, Domestic Violence, Eating Disorders, Family Dysfunction, Grief/
Populations Served
ACOA (Adult Children of Alcoholics), Gay/Lesbian/Bisexual, Military/Veterans, Twins, Disabled, Caregivers, Step Families, Cancer Patients, Interracial Families/Couples
Membership Organizations
HelpPro.com
Age Groups Served
Adults (26-59), Seniors (60 +)

Data Provided by:
Ms. Maria Migliore
(631) 431-7186
1050 Hallock Avenue
Port Jefferson Station, NY
Credentials
Credentials: LMSW
Licensed in New York
9 Years of Experience
Problems Served
Adoption/Foster Care, Anxiety/Panic Disorders, Attention Deficit (Hyperactivity) Disorder, Behavioral Problems, Bipolar Disorders, Child Abuse and Neglect, Depression, Developmental Disability, Domestic Violence, Family Dysfunction, Interpersonal Relations
Populations Served
Children of Divorce, Disabled, Step Families
Membership Organizations
HelpPro.com
Age Groups Served
Preschool (Under 6), Children (6-12), Adolescents (13-17), Young Adults (18-25)

Data Provided by:
Ms. Donna Demian
Donna Demian, LCSW-R
(631) 751-2266
1050 Hallock Ave., Suite 1
Port Jefferson Station, NY
Credentials
Credentials: LCSW-R
Licensed in New York
38 Years of Experience
Problems Served
Behavioral Problems, Child Abuse and Neglect, Depression, Developmental Disability, Family Dysfunction, Grief/Loss, Learning Disabilities, Parenting Issues, Pregnancy/Childbirth, Trauma/PTSD, Women's Issues, Infant Mental Health
Populations Served
Children of Divorce
Membership Organizations
HelpPro.com
Age Groups Served
Preschool (Under 6), Children (6-12)

Data Provided by:
Dr. Suzanne Velazquez
Butterfly LMSW P.C.
(631) 666-1951
1303 Main Street
Port Jefferson, NY
Credentials
Credentials: PhD, LMSW
Licensed in New York
10 Years of Experience
Problems Served
Anxiety/Panic Disorders, Behavioral Problems, Career/Employment Concerns, Couple or Marital Issues, Depression, Family Dysfunction, Interpersonal Relationships, Stress, Education/Personal Development, Life Transitions, Women's Issues
Populations Served
Children of Divorce, Step Families
Membership Organizations
HelpPro.com
Age Groups Served
Children (6-12), Young Adults (18-25), Adults (26-59)

Data Provided by:
Mr. Steve Hauptman
Steve Hauptman, LCSW
(631) 821-1861
Portview Building, Suite 6 28 North Country Road
Mount Sinai, NY
Credentials
Credentials: LCSW
Licensed in New York
17 Years of Experience
Problems Served
Addictions/Other (gambling, sex, etc.), Addictions/Substance, Anxiety/Panic Disorders, Couple or Marital Issues, Depression, Family Dysfunction, Interpersonal Relationships, Parenting Issues, Stress, Trauma/PTSD, Dual Diagnosis
Populations Served
ACOA (Adult Children of Alcoholics)
Membership Organizations
HelpPro.com
Age Groups Served
Adults (26-59)

Data Provided by:
Ms. Gina Fattibene
(631) 879-1840
55 Nesconset Highway
Port Jefferson Station, NY
Credentials
Credentials: LCSW
Licensed in New York
6 Years of Experience
Problems Served
Anxiety/Panic Disorders, Behavioral Problems, Bipolar Disorders, Career/Employment Concerns, Couple or Marital Issues, Depression, Family Dysfunction, Grief/Loss, Infertility, Interpersonal Relationships, Multicultural Issues, Obsessive/Compulsive Disorder
Populations Served
Children of Divorce
Membership Organizations
HelpPro.com
Age Groups Served
Children (6-12), Adolescents (13-17), Young Adults (18-25), Adults (26-59), Seniors (60 +)

Data Provided by:
Mr. Scott Burzon
Suffolk Behavioral Consultation and Counseling
(516) 446-8368
1050 Hallock Avenue
Port Jefferson Station, NY
Credentials
Credentials: LCSW-R, C.Ht
Licensed in New York
19 Years of Experience
Problems Served
Anxiety/Panic Disorders, Behavioral Problems, Bipolar Disorders, Child Abuse and Neglect, Couple or Marital Issues, Depression, Domestic Violence, Family Dysfunction, Grief/Loss, Interpersonal Relationships, Parenting Issues, Phobias, Self Abuse, Sexual Ab
Membership Organizations
HelpPro.com
Age Groups Served
Adolescents (13-17), Young Adults (18-25), Adults (26-59)

Data Provided by:
Mrs. Rosemary Scheiber
Rosemary Scheiber, LCSW-R
(631) 355-6022
1050 Hallock Avenue
Port Jefferson Station, NY
Credentials
Credentials: LCSW-R
Licensed in New York
7 Years of Experience
Problems Served
Anxiety/Panic Disorders, Behavioral Problems, Depression, Family Dysfunction, Interpersonal Relationships, Parenting Issues, Self Abuse, Stress, Life Transitions, Women's Issues
Populations Served
Children of Divorce
Membership Organizations
HelpPro.com
Age Groups Served
Preschool (Under 6), Children (6-12), Adolescents (13-17), Young Adults (18-25), Adults (26-59), Seniors (60 +)

Data Provided by:
Mr. James Durand
Bright Beginnings Counseling
(631) 475-3754
755 Waverly Avenue Suite 402
Holtsville, NY
Credentials
Credentials: LCSW-R
Licensed in New York
15 Years of Experience
Problems Served
Attention Deficit (Hyperactivity) Disorder, Behavioral Problems, Family Dysfunction, Parenting Issues
Populations Served
Children of Divorce, Step Families
Membership Organizations
HelpPro.com
Age Groups Served
Children (6-12), Adolescents (13-17), Young Adults (18-25), Adults (26-59)

Data Provided by:
Ms. Jill Kofler
(631) 525-3521
496 Smithtown Bypass Ste. 304
Smithtown, NY
Credentials
Credentials: LMHC, NCC
Licensed in New York
10 Years of Experience
Problems Served
Couple or Marital Issues, Depression, Family Dysfunction, Grief/Loss, Interpersonal Relationships, Parenting Issues, Physical Illness/Impairment, Stress, Education/Personal Development, Life Transitions
Populations Served
Caregivers, Chronic Illness, Cancer Patients
Membership Organizations
HelpPro.com
Age Groups Served
Adults (26-59)

Data Provided by:
Data Provided by:

Five Tips to Help Parents Listen

Provided By: 

Parent & Child

Parents, Are You Listening or Lecturing to Your Kids? Five Tips to Help You Listen
By Julie Scandora 
Email
Feb 11, 2009, 10:44
   

Seattle, WA - The knowledge that our children are safe, happy and emotionally sound is one of our greatest concerns. If they were being traumatized by something at school or, even worse, the attentions of a predator, we would want to be the first to know.

The only way we can truly be sure that they are all right, or if something is troubling them, is if they feel they can confide in us on a person-to-person basis. But are we actually listening to them as equals, or are we listening to them with condescending ears and, in the process, inadvertently breaking these lines of communication between parent and child -- leaving them unwilling to come to us for help?

"Children don't seem to get as much respect as other members of society," says Julie Scandora, teacher and author of the book 'Rules Are Rules.' "They experience the same emotional obstacles as adults, but this is often overlooked by grown-ups. Parents need to treat children with respect and ensure a trusting relationship."

Here are five of Julie's tips to help you communicate more effectively with your children:

1. Listen. It sounds obvious, but if your children don't think they will be heard, they won't go to you with the hard questions or problems.

2. Create opportunities for interaction with your kids. Families spend so much time apart these days. Use 'car time' -- such as the 20-minute drive to school – as a time to communicate with your children.

3. Lead by example. Far too many parents opt for the 'do as I say not as I do' method. But this sends mixed messages to children regarding important situations.

4. Respect the child's intuition. We all have 'gut feelings,' and if kids are encouraged to trust theirs, they will be able to heed their intuition in dicey situations when we aren't around to help.

5. Don't confuse 'respect' with 'giving in.' It is important that the parental role is not usurped. Don't give in to kids just to diffuse a problematic situation. Instead communicate with them and let them know why rules are rules.

By showing our children that we are receptive to what they have to say and that we are willing to talk with them, not just at them, we can help them gain confidence and maturity, but we need to make sure we are practicing what we preach.

"Perhaps we need to start with ourselves, don't we!" laughs Julie, "But if we give our children the respect we give our peers, they will be better prepared to deal with whatever life throws at them. And when they encounter something for which they are still too young to deal with by themselves, they'll naturally come to us for advice."

--
Julie Scandora is a teacher, editor, author and mother of three. She holds a BA from Smith and an MBA from the University of Washington and has taught c...

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