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Five Tips to Help Parents Listen Aiea HI

The only way we can truly be sure that they are all right, or if something is troubling them, is if they feel they can confide in us on a person-to-person basis. But are we actually listening to them as equals, or are we listening to them with condescending ears and, in the process, inadvertently breaking these lines of communication between parent and child -- leaving them unwilling to come to us for help?

Mr. Terry Martin
Terry J Martin LCSW, DCSW
(808) 271-5112
98-211 Pali Momi St. Suite 707
Aiea, HI
Credentials
Credentials: LCSW, DCSW
Licensed in Hawaii
20 Years of Experience
Problems Served
Addictions/Substance, Anxiety/Panic Disorders, Behavioral Problems, Couple or Marital Issues, Depression, Family Dysfunction, Interpersonal Relationships, Attachment Disorders
Populations Served
Children of Divorce, Military/Veterans
Membership Organizations
HelpPro.com
Age Groups Served
Adults (26-59)

Data Provided by:
Dr. Leon Pereira
Leon C Pereira PhD
(808) 255-3618
45-955 Kamehameha Hwy Suite 401
Kaneohe, HI
Credentials
Credentials: PhD
Licensed in Hawaii
13 Years of Experience
Problems Served
Anxiety/Panic Disorders, Attention Deficit (Hyperactivity) Disorder, Behavioral Problems, Bipolar Disorders, Couple or Marital Issues, Depression, Family Dysfunction, Interpersonal Relationships, Parenting Issues, Stress, Trauma/PTSD, Personality Disorders
Populations Served
Children of Divorce, Step Families, Interracial Families/Couples, Biracial, College Students
Membership Organizations
HelpPro.com
Age Groups Served
Children (6-12), Adolescents (13-17), Young Adults (18-25), Adults (26-59), Seniors (60 +)

Data Provided by:
Ms. Clary Mitchell-Smith
(808) 951-8560
2015 Lime Street #204
Honolulu, HI
Credentials
Credentials: LCSW
Licensed in Hawaii
35 Years of Experience
Problems Served
Addictions/Other (gambling, sex, etc.), Addictions/Substance, Aging, Anxiety/Panic Disorders, Career/Employment Concerns, Couple or Marital Issues, Depression, Dissociative Disorders, Eating Disorders, Family Dysfunction, Grief/Loss, Interpersonal Relation
Populations Served
ACOA (Adult Children of Alcoholics), Gay/Lesbian/Bisexual, Interracial Families/Couples
Membership Organizations
HelpPro.com
Age Groups Served
Young Adults (18-25), Adults (26-59), Seniors (60 +)

Data Provided by:
Ms. Trenda Lee Berkey, LCSW
(808) 382-3388
98-211 Pali Momi St. Ste 707
Aiea, HI
Specialties
Addictions or Substance Abuse,ADHD,Anger Management,Anxiety or Fears,Child or Adolescent Issues,Depression,Divorce,Domestic Abuse or Violence,Eating Disorders,Parenting
Gender
Female
Education
University of Hawaii at LCCUniversity of Hawaii at West OahuUniversity of Hawaii at Manoa
Insurance
Yes
Membership Organizations
Psychotherapy Works Inc.

Ann Dorado
(808) 455-0652
Pearl City, HI
Practice Areas
Career Development, Counselor Education, Couples & Family, School, Mental Health/Agency Counseling
Certifications
National Certified Counselor
Language Proficiencies
tagalog

Mr. Dan Baram
Malama Project Inc
(808) 228-8957
98-084 Kamehameha Hwy Suite 301B
Aiea, HI
Credentials
Credentials: LCSW
Licensed in Hawaii
18 Years of Experience
Problems Served
Anxiety/Panic Disorders, Attention Deficit (Hyperactivity) Disorder, Behavioral Problems, Bipolar Disorders, Child Abuse and Neglect, Couple or Marital Issues, Depression, Dissociative Disorders, Family Dysfunction, Interpersonal Relationships, Multicultur
Populations Served
AIDS/HIV+, Children of Divorce, Gay/Lesbian/Bisexual, Military/Veterans, Step Families, Chronic Illness, Interracial Families/Couples
Membership Organizations
HelpPro.com
Age Groups Served
Children (6-12), Adolescents (13-17), Young Adults (18-25), Adults (26-59)

Data Provided by:
Ms. Cheyenne Akana
Cheyenne Akana, LCSW
(808) 941-1800
1806 S. King Street, Suite 24
Honolulu, HI
Credentials
Credentials: LCSW
Licensed in Hawaii
11 Years of Experience
Problems Served
Anxiety/Panic Disorders, Attention Deficit (Hyperactivity) Disorder, Autism/PDD, Behavioral Problems, Bipolar Disorders, Child Abuse and Neglect, Depression, Developmental Disability, Family Dysfunction, Interpersonal Relationships, Parenting Issues, Self
Populations Served
ACOA (Adult Children of Alcoholics), Children of Divorce, Military/Veterans, Disabled, Caregivers, Step Families, Interracial Families/Couples, Biracial, Grandparents
Membership Organizations
HelpPro.com
Age Groups Served
Preschool (Under 6), Children (6-12), Adolescents (13-17), Young Adults (18-25), Adults (26-59)

Data Provided by:
Ms. Sharon Usagawa
Ho`omalie/Tranquility
(808) 386-8523
970 N. Kalaheo Ave. Suite C201
Kailua, HI
Credentials
Credentials: LCSW
Licensed in Hawaii
20 Years of Experience
Problems Served
Anxiety/Panic Disorders, Behavioral Problems, Child Abuse and Neglect, Couple or Marital Issues, Depression, Domestic Violence, Family Dysfunction, Grief/Loss, Interpersonal Relationships, Parenting Issues, Runaways, Self Abuse, Spiritual/Religious Concern
Populations Served
ACOA (Adult Children of Alcoholics), Children of Divorce, Gay/Lesbian/Bisexual, Transgendered, Military/Veterans, Caregivers, Step Families, Interracial Families/Couples, Biracial, Grandparents
Membership Organizations
HelpPro.com
Age Groups Served
Children (6-12), Adolescents (13-17), Young Adults (18-25), Adults (26-59), Seniors (60 +)

Data Provided by:
Eleanor Sharsh
(808) 485-0206
Aiea, HI
Practice Areas
Childhood & Adolescence, Couples & Family, School, Depression/Grief/Chronically or Terminally Ill, Mental Health/Agency Counseling
Certifications
National Certified Counselor

DarLene Jones
(808) 847-9857
Pearl City, HI
Practice Areas
Addictions and Dependency, Career Development, Childhood & Adolescence, Clinical Mental Health, Couples & Family
Certifications
National Certified Counselor
Language Proficiencies
Spanish,

Data Provided by:

Five Tips to Help Parents Listen

Provided By: 

Parent & Child

Parents, Are You Listening or Lecturing to Your Kids? Five Tips to Help You Listen
By Julie Scandora 
Email
Feb 11, 2009, 10:44
   

Seattle, WA - The knowledge that our children are safe, happy and emotionally sound is one of our greatest concerns. If they were being traumatized by something at school or, even worse, the attentions of a predator, we would want to be the first to know.

The only way we can truly be sure that they are all right, or if something is troubling them, is if they feel they can confide in us on a person-to-person basis. But are we actually listening to them as equals, or are we listening to them with condescending ears and, in the process, inadvertently breaking these lines of communication between parent and child -- leaving them unwilling to come to us for help?

"Children don't seem to get as much respect as other members of society," says Julie Scandora, teacher and author of the book 'Rules Are Rules.' "They experience the same emotional obstacles as adults, but this is often overlooked by grown-ups. Parents need to treat children with respect and ensure a trusting relationship."

Here are five of Julie's tips to help you communicate more effectively with your children:

1. Listen. It sounds obvious, but if your children don't think they will be heard, they won't go to you with the hard questions or problems.

2. Create opportunities for interaction with your kids. Families spend so much time apart these days. Use 'car time' -- such as the 20-minute drive to school – as a time to communicate with your children.

3. Lead by example. Far too many parents opt for the 'do as I say not as I do' method. But this sends mixed messages to children regarding important situations.

4. Respect the child's intuition. We all have 'gut feelings,' and if kids are encouraged to trust theirs, they will be able to heed their intuition in dicey situations when we aren't around to help.

5. Don't confuse 'respect' with 'giving in.' It is important that the parental role is not usurped. Don't give in to kids just to diffuse a problematic situation. Instead communicate with them and let them know why rules are rules.

By showing our children that we are receptive to what they have to say and that we are willing to talk with them, not just at them, we can help them gain confidence and maturity, but we need to make sure we are practicing what we preach.

"Perhaps we need to start with ourselves, don't we!" laughs Julie, "But if we give our children the respect we give our peers, they will be better prepared to deal with whatever life throws at them. And when they encounter something for which they are still too young to deal with by themselves, they'll naturally come to us for advice."

--
Julie Scandora is a teacher, editor, author and mother of three. She holds a BA from Smith and an MBA from the University of Washington and has taught c...

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